Seeking God

Both sides

Sometimes, you’re the daughter craving for your mother’s approval. Sometimes, you’re the mother craving for your daughter’s approval.

Sometimes, you are lonely and wish for companionship. Sometimes, you have too much companionship and wish for solitude.

Sometimes, you’re stuck in an office and miss the calm of the trees. Sometimes, you have the trees but miss the stimulation of an office.

Sometimes, you’re a busy editor with freelance writers chasing you for payments. Sometimes, you’re a freelance writer chasing busy editors for payments.

Sometimes, you’re both things at the same time.

Sometimes, you curse the ‘mall culture’ for promoting consumerism and ruining the environment. Sometimes, you head to the mall for just that spa where you can get just that heavenly foot massage.

Sometimes, it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead. 

Sometimes, you enjoy Adele.

Sometimes, you wear a sari and think, ‘Ah, this is so me.’ Sometimes, you wear trousers and a flowy top and think, ‘Ah this is so me.’ Sometimes, you wear a kurti with jeans and think, ‘Ah, this is so me. Too.’

Sometimes, to cleave means to split. Sometimes, to cleave means to join.

Sometimes, you zoom across lanes and overtake others on the road and adrenaline rushes through your veins. Sometimes, you sit back and let others overtake you and it doesn’t really matter.

Sometimes, you give money to a beggar and feel guilty for propagating the beggars’ mafia. Sometimes, you don’t give money and feel like a heartless monster.

Sometimes, you have a pimple on your forehead. Sometimes, you’re acne-free. Sometimes, you win. Sometimes, you lose. Sometimes, you frown. Sometimes, you guffaw. Sometimes, you believe Arushi’s dad killed her. Sometimes, you can’t believe he would.

Sometimes, you think about life. You don’t think so much about death. Except that if it comes, you’re pretty happy with all you’ve managed to try out in this life. It’s not been a total waste. Oh no, not at all a waste.

One day in your Gita class, you learn that human existence is all about making peace with duality. And then it all makes sense.

Sometimes, you can cleave a story into two.

Sometimes, you cleave both sides into a story.

 

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